Monday, January 31, 2011

Baby Feats of Strength and Other Hobbies

It's raining here. And cold. And drearier than a Charles Dickens' novel. So, because I'm attempting to stave off a serious case of Seasonal Affective Disorder, I thought I'd jot down a few items of interest regarding Sam and his recent doings.

I thought you might be wondering what sort of hobbies 14 month old Sam is picking up these days. I figured I'd list them for you in case you want to suggest them to your favorite child or perhaps even try them out for yourself.

The first baby hobby I'd like to present to you is:
"Baby Feats of Strength"
Sam's just recently picked this one up and so we're still discovering what all this particular hobby entails. Basically, Baby Feats of Strength involves picking up objects that are either a. awkward for you to carry b. as big and/or tall as you are c. unnecessary to move d. obviously too heavy for you to pick up. For reference, here's a short list of items that Sam enjoys lifting and/or carrying from one place to another:

a. brooms/swiffers (often at the same time)
b. Matt's size 11 shoes
d. toys that are meant to stay in one place (eg: a toy piano, a music table)
e. a Sam-sized bag of blocks
d. the vacuum cleaner
e. the baby gate

Baby Feats of Strengths are usually accompanied by loud baby grunts as Sam huffs and puffs around the room carrying his unusually large item from chair to sofa to mama and back. It's a good time all around and I'm only slightly concerned that this may translate later into WWF-related hobbies and possibly excessive amounts of time at the gym. But, let's hope not. So far, Baby Feats of Strength is quite the crowd pleaser. It's also a big hit at parties.

The second baby hobby I thought you might be interested in is:
"Baby Prank Call"
This hobby is one that we keep pretty tight reins on, but occasionally, when we get desperate on a long trip with three wet diaper stops, we give in and pass our phones over to Sam. Technology is obviously the new pacifier. Tears instantly dry when the colorful light of a Samsung screen lights up inside a dark car.

Basically, Baby Prank Call is somewhat unplanned, and can happen without any warning so that you may not know it's even happened for days or maybe ever. For example, a recent Baby Prank Call took place on a trip much like the aforementioned one (i.e. full of baby angst) and a bout of gully-washing tears was stilled by the calming glow of Matt's flip phone. This was tossed over the side of the newly purchased front-facing carseat/throne that Sam now occupies. So, my phone with it's fascinating touch screen was hesitatingly passed into cheerio-scented little hands. It too found itself tossed overboard within minutes and we were back to the monsoon of tears and ear-piercing yells. And so we proceeded to give Sam a rousing acapella concert that included the following songs:

The Animal Fair
John the Rabbit
The Moose Juice Song
The Wheels on the Bus
Father Abraham
Blackjack Baby
Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
Old Macdonald

And the list goes on, and on, and on. But, then we ran out of songs. And Sam got antsy. And then Sam got loud. So, without thinking, I found myself belting out "God Bless America" and then "The Star Spangled Banner" and then...we were home. Crisis averted.

The next morning, I found a text on my phone that asked if I was feeling patriotic. I've never been asked that before, but I do, in fact, feel patriotic on occasion. I called my friend to ask what the text meant. As it turns out, Baby Prank Call had struck. Sam's innocent tossing of the phone over the side of his carseat had apparently also included pressing a few choice buttons before the tossing. And, our patriotic concert had been recorded in it's entirety on my friend's voicemail. Lovely.

Baby Prank Call may be a hobby you choose not to share with your little one. We're working on replacing this hobby with a few others that are a little less socially awkward. However, if you get an unusual text or a voicemail that seems a little out of character from Matt or me, chalk it up to Sam's hobby and try not to judge us too harshly.

Other hobbies will have to discussed later due to Sam's nap having come to an end. Tune in next time for: "Baby Streaking" and "Baby Trash the Joint."

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